It’s well known that depression can come from feeling lonely, but what about when the loneliness isn’t yours? When you’re dating, whether it’s casually or seriously, you can find yourself in situations where you feel left out, rejected, or lonely despite being in a relationship. Dating makes you feel depressed because of three reasons: low self-esteem, lack of communication, and unreasonable expectations. If you can fix these issues, you won’t have to deal with dating-related depression anymore!
1) Checking your phone all the time
If you’re dating and spending a lot of time with someone, it’s inevitable that you two will text each other. The problem is that our phones can pull us away from enjoying real-life experiences and conversations with friends. If you find yourself checking your phone all too often while on a date, stop! Put your phone down and spend some quality time with your special someone instead. It’ll be worth it when you look back on your relationship later. Remember to value quality over quantity. When in doubt, remember what John Green said: Never trust anyone who doesn’t regularly use emojis. (But then again, never trust anyone who uses too many emojis.)
Mary Shelley's work was first submitted to Voluble Collective as part of an assignment for her English 302 course at Santa Clara University called Voluble Creatives, an online platform where students could create their own blogging communities.
2) Dealing with rejection
Because dating is a numbers game, you can’t let rejection get to you. If someone turns you down, don’t take it personally—they might not be interested in your looks or personality, they might have a boyfriend or girlfriend, or they could just not want to date at all. Instead of letting rejection derail your confidence, try doing something else after each date that doesn’t involve another person: workout, read a book or hang out with friends instead of playing games on your phone. And if you end up going on several bad dates? Take a break from dating for a while and focus on yourself! Read a self-help book, join some online communities where like-minded people share stories and experiences, or start writing a journal about your experiences. The more time you spend on activities unrelated to romance, the easier it will be to appreciate when things do work out.
3) Keeping in touch with your ex
If you’re feeling depressed, it may be tempting to reach out to your ex and try to repair your relationship. However, don’t allow negative emotions about yourself to make you stay in a toxic relationship with someone who once had feelings for you. This can only lead to more depression and bad decision-making. Instead, rely on friends or family members for support when going through heartbreak. You’ll need positive relationships in your life to help keep your spirits up while getting over an ex. Once you’ve started feeling better, it will be easier to make better decisions that won’t involve contacting your ex. While no two people are alike, here are some things that might help if you find yourself struggling: Reach out to close friends. Being around supportive people will improve your mood. If a friend doesn't know how to relate to what you're going through, try talking with another friend or professional counselor (or both). Stay busy.
If you really want to stop being depressed for any special reason then I RECOMMEND you watch this LIVE podcast where the Doctor talks about it all.
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